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Ronnie posted in the group We Are More Than Our Mental Health
So I have to make a choice. I have to make a choice on whether I want to see my best friends again. Part of me wants to so I can see how it plays out, but there’s another part that is just screaming not to. That every scenario in my head ends badly even though I try to change that picture.
I wrote letters to them. Breakup letters if you will. I haven’t decided on whether I should send them or not.
I wrote them 3 letters in the past 3 years and not once have they written me back or texted me about what I wrote.
I just don’t know if I can do it anymore. My olive branch to them is about ready to snap, and I’m just not sure I can hold out any longer hoping they’d get back to me because they haven’t.
Part of me wants to send them so badly, but I know if I do I’m risking our friendship. I know if I don’t then I’m holding on by a thread and trying to hold out hope when I know that hope has been slowly fading.
I just wish I knew what to do about both situations: the letter and seeing them. It’s all so complicated.
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Decided not to go. I just can’t do it with all of the pent up anger I have. It would be too fake and I know the second I get there I’d rather be anywhere else. Thankfully my decision is made easy because my sister is in town this weekend so that helps. Still though, even if she weren’t, I still would not go. It’s too hard and I’m barely working with these issues in therapy to the point I’m just not ready yet. Instead I wrote them one final letter. Call it a goodbye letter (maybe), but hopefully they’ll read them and decide what to do next because I am so done.
I’d say maybe see them one more time to see how it goes. If it still doesn’t go well then it’s definitely time to end it. If they’re still not going to be there for you after all this time then they’re not worth it. You deserve better.